hello!
thought i should update this. will just stick my gigs up for now... sorry there aren't many of them. i'm mainly writing my radio show at the moment.
january 19th - wilton's music hall
fabulous venue, and it's free!
http://wiltons.org.uk/event.php?p=519
january 22nd - de luxe comedy
hosting chortle's new gig at the luxe.
http://www.wegottickets.com/event/201504
february 4th - voices in your head
mental, dark and hilarious improv.
http://www.sohotheatre.com/whats-on/voices-in-your-head/
february 11th - #acms
no explanation. it will sell out.
http://noblefailure.org/
february 19th onwards! - coalition
the london run of coalition. it's gonna be super.
http://www.pleasance.co.uk/islington/events/coalition--2
the blog of thom tuck.
16.1.13
3.6.12
edinburgh twenty twelve.
well. hello.
i should probably tell you what i am doing in edinburgh this year. i am doing three shows. which is too much, but they are all going to be an amazing amount of fun.
they are:
Coalition
Pleasance Dome, 14.00
A play about the imagined demise of the Con-Dem Coalition government. I play the leader of the Liberal Democrats in a stunning cast including Phill Jupitus, Simon Evans, Jo Caulfield & Alistair Barrie.
tickets.
Thom Tuck Flips Out
Pleasance Dome, 20.10
My new stand-up show about masculinity, personhood and gymnastics.
tickets.
Thom Tuck Goes Straight-to-DVD
Cabaret Voltaire, 10.05
My award-losing show from last year, now for free! Expect some messing around and possibly a special guest.
free, so turn up early.
i should probably tell you what i am doing in edinburgh this year. i am doing three shows. which is too much, but they are all going to be an amazing amount of fun.
they are:
Coalition
Pleasance Dome, 14.00
A play about the imagined demise of the Con-Dem Coalition government. I play the leader of the Liberal Democrats in a stunning cast including Phill Jupitus, Simon Evans, Jo Caulfield & Alistair Barrie.
tickets.
Thom Tuck Flips Out
Pleasance Dome, 20.10
My new stand-up show about masculinity, personhood and gymnastics.
tickets.
Thom Tuck Goes Straight-to-DVD
Cabaret Voltaire, 10.05
My award-losing show from last year, now for free! Expect some messing around and possibly a special guest.
free, so turn up early.
4.1.12
and, apparently...
...i was in the sun last week. as something or other for 2012. anyone have a copy?
the imminent death
today is a wednesday. the first wednesday of 2012: the year that may (mayan not) be that of our destruction. one thing is for certain, the #acms is dead. long live the #acms. the next show will be our last at the New Red Lion, which is the only home the venue has ever known. come one, come all, to watch its death throes.
we will poke around in its entrails and throw them on the fire. it will rise again. how, and when, are questions we do not yet know the answers to. there is an ongoing (and vitriolic) email between the board members on the future of our precious baby. will baby go to college? should we have set some money aside in case it never amounts to anything and wants to move back in? will it take care of us in our old age? not necessarily financially, but wiping up our ancient comedy drool. we all know this metaphor has gone on too far. but never quitting in the face of a certain ending is what the #acms is all about. it's in its DNA, that we gave to it, because it is our baby.
in other news, i am doing ten minutes with matthew crosby next week (details right) to celebrate him allowing me to. it is going to be new material. well, newish. well, there will be some new bits. i think. i am going to sit down with a massive piece of paper now. it will definitely be about dick-swinging, economics and not being a fightyman.
we will poke around in its entrails and throw them on the fire. it will rise again. how, and when, are questions we do not yet know the answers to. there is an ongoing (and vitriolic) email between the board members on the future of our precious baby. will baby go to college? should we have set some money aside in case it never amounts to anything and wants to move back in? will it take care of us in our old age? not necessarily financially, but wiping up our ancient comedy drool. we all know this metaphor has gone on too far. but never quitting in the face of a certain ending is what the #acms is all about. it's in its DNA, that we gave to it, because it is our baby.
in other news, i am doing ten minutes with matthew crosby next week (details right) to celebrate him allowing me to. it is going to be new material. well, newish. well, there will be some new bits. i think. i am going to sit down with a massive piece of paper now. it will definitely be about dick-swinging, economics and not being a fightyman.
26.9.11
play in music
well. it has been an inordinately long time since i have posted. sorry.
during august, every day i was performing my show at the edinburgh festival. it was the first time a show was 100% mine: writing, performing, directing. it was just me and my excellent producer lucy. funnily enough, though, one of the things i was most excited about was being in charge of the music before and after the show. it's an important decision, and one that isn't always given the requisite amount of thought. it sets the tone for the audience as they are coming in and sends them out into the world in a very specific mood. for all the penny dreadfuls' shows we have had the brilliant neil hobbs picking the tunes. and he always got it right.
but, this time, it was all up to me. how exciting. i am a phenomenal bore when it comes to music. i love it, and will never stop banging on about what i am currently listening to, be it hall and oates, ethiopian jazz, ryan adams or wynonie harris. i am the kind of douche who will usurp the stereo at a party in seconds. i will probably play good music, but you'll resent the speed at which i have taken over.
so, because my show was quite odd, i knew i had to pick songs that were a little unusual. they had to be songs that no-one else would use at the start of their show. so, the song i went for was this:
it is from the prince movie purple rain. it is a phenomenal film for two reasons. one, the music. two, it's a semi-autobiographical film and prince has written himself as an total arsehole. it's hilarious. either he has an incredible amount of self-awareness or none.
but the reason i chose this song is because of the breakdown which comes about two thirds in. it really needs the buildup in the song and is really helped if you can see the video. he really means it, that prince, doe'n't he? well, basically, that would always be the final song that played before i did my show. it's pretty intense. and i would be backstage doing all the prince moves as little warmup, trying not to sing too loudly. it's an appropriate way to set the tone for a weird show about love, i think.
and the playout music was this.
during august, every day i was performing my show at the edinburgh festival. it was the first time a show was 100% mine: writing, performing, directing. it was just me and my excellent producer lucy. funnily enough, though, one of the things i was most excited about was being in charge of the music before and after the show. it's an important decision, and one that isn't always given the requisite amount of thought. it sets the tone for the audience as they are coming in and sends them out into the world in a very specific mood. for all the penny dreadfuls' shows we have had the brilliant neil hobbs picking the tunes. and he always got it right.
but, this time, it was all up to me. how exciting. i am a phenomenal bore when it comes to music. i love it, and will never stop banging on about what i am currently listening to, be it hall and oates, ethiopian jazz, ryan adams or wynonie harris. i am the kind of douche who will usurp the stereo at a party in seconds. i will probably play good music, but you'll resent the speed at which i have taken over.
so, because my show was quite odd, i knew i had to pick songs that were a little unusual. they had to be songs that no-one else would use at the start of their show. so, the song i went for was this:
it is from the prince movie purple rain. it is a phenomenal film for two reasons. one, the music. two, it's a semi-autobiographical film and prince has written himself as an total arsehole. it's hilarious. either he has an incredible amount of self-awareness or none.
but the reason i chose this song is because of the breakdown which comes about two thirds in. it really needs the buildup in the song and is really helped if you can see the video. he really means it, that prince, doe'n't he? well, basically, that would always be the final song that played before i did my show. it's pretty intense. and i would be backstage doing all the prince moves as little warmup, trying not to sing too loudly. it's an appropriate way to set the tone for a weird show about love, i think.
and the playout music was this.
9.6.11
slä-pē sɛkənds
as a thursday rolls around and i realise that i have not updated my blog for a while i recall that thursdays are the days i talk about games. and then i had a wee flashback. a couple of weeks ago i was interviewed by the lovely jay richardson for (scottish arts magazine) the list. he texted me to say that he was going to ring me slightly later than agreed because he was trying to get his head round "my insane card game post". oops.
i think one is supposed to use a blog for flagrant self-promotion but, while there will be a degree of that, i don't really see the point in not actually writing about anything but oneself. there is, of course, an argument that all writing is about oneself. my counter to this is "cat sat on mat". that's definitely about a cat. (he's on a mat in a sitting position). but, regardless of its stupefying effect on comedy journos, i will plough on regardless!
on new year's eve, i made everybody play a hand of this for a fiver. bruce took home £35. brilliant. stupid, yet brilliant.
and on a shameless self-promotion front: my show in edinburgh.
i think one is supposed to use a blog for flagrant self-promotion but, while there will be a degree of that, i don't really see the point in not actually writing about anything but oneself. there is, of course, an argument that all writing is about oneself. my counter to this is "cat sat on mat". that's definitely about a cat. (he's on a mat in a sitting position). but, regardless of its stupefying effect on comedy journos, i will plough on regardless!
so, today i will be discussing another poker variant wot i made up. i made it up years ago (probably seven) with a friend called kerri. it's called sloppy seconds and it's monstrously silly. first of all you need to know how to play poker. if you don't, go away and come back after you are basically there. second, it is a five-card draw game. we all cool? ok... you look at your five cards and decide on which two cards (and only two) that you are going to pass to the left. then you reassess and swap two with the deck. twos are wild. can you see how mental this game is already? TWO mandatory swaps of TWO cards and TWO is wild. sloppy seconds.
on new year's eve, i made everybody play a hand of this for a fiver. bruce took home £35. brilliant. stupid, yet brilliant.
and on a shameless self-promotion front: my show in edinburgh.
28.3.11
m to the you [sic]
hullo the interwebs,
just a quick one, really, as i need to be doing some writing for my solo show (thom tuck goes straight-to-dvd). i've performed it a few times now (not enough, according to my agent). and it's gone well. it's still monster short, so i've got lots to do.
am experimenting with some structural changes!
during the meanwhilst here are me gigs in the next wee while (april 2011):
just a quick one, really, as i need to be doing some writing for my solo show (thom tuck goes straight-to-dvd). i've performed it a few times now (not enough, according to my agent). and it's gone well. it's still monster short, so i've got lots to do.
am experimenting with some structural changes!
during the meanwhilst here are me gigs in the next wee while (april 2011):
- the fifth : will be the third meeting of the alternative comedy memorial societ (or, the captain planet repertory theatre company). it's fun, and kevin eldon is on. tickets http://bit.ly/gUtLZ5.
- the sixth : a bit (possibly a new bit) at the ransom club at leicester square theatre.
- the fifteenth : a gig in a bookshop (big green books in wood green).
- the nineteenth (a) : tiernan's mighty fat tuesday, and...
- the nineteenth (b) : the fourth meeting of the above #ACMS.
- the twenty first : compering for robin and partridge at one of their crazy gigs, man.
- the twenty second : colin hoult's new adventures was a lovely gig last time. the theme this time is very exciting (i'm not sure if i'm allowed to say or not, but i'm writing something especially for it).
- the thirtieth : my solo show. in wales! http://bit.ly/eLs9LV.
24.2.11
/dəˈmɪniən/
thor's day! games day!
i'm very excited to blog this. i have played a new game. and it is excellent. you should get it. it is, almost inevitably, a rio grande game. a quick google reveals them to be an american company. and they specialise in importing german games. NB, the germans are far, far better at making board games than us. this, though is designed by the wonderfully monikered donald x. vaccarino, who is american. imagine! it won the big prize at the german game awards (that is a big thing) like the excellent carcassone before it.
the name of the game is dominion and it is a deck-building game. i've never seen this sort of game engine before, and it reminded me in a way of my all-time favourite game - magic: the gathering (previous blog here). yes, i am aware of how massive a dweeb i am. now, what this actually means is that you have a deck of cards each and there are all the rest of the cards in organised piles on the table. the card types are: money, victory and kingdom cards. you buy new victory and kingdom cards with the money cards (once a turn). you use kingdom cards to do stuff (once a turn). and you use victory cards to win (count up at the end). what is fun is that you keep adding to your deck and when it is done you shuffle and deal a new hand from the deck; it is recycled again and again as you add to it and you've got to keep the balance right between the types of cards in your deck.
why is this good, then? well... the key lies in a concept called card advantage, which is a concept in magic: the gathering theory. (seriously, you have no idea how massive a loser i am). basically, the idea is that if you get to use more cards than the opposition then you will win (ceteris parabus). how does this work in dominion? good question, team. what i've neglected to say so far is what "stuff" the kingdom cards let you do. with them you can throw a card out of your deck in exchange for a different one, or force an opponent to throw a card away, or steal one from them or (and here's the good bit) draw more cards. there is nothing as powerful as drawing more cards in these kind of games. in addition, some cards let you play an extra kingdom card on your turn. if you get to draw and play another card, you are laughing. if you manage to build up a string of manoeuvres (this program says that's a mis-spelt word; it can go fuck itself) where you draw card after card and do action after action you are giggling uncontrollably while the other players wait for their turn. well, i am.
this is probably really badly explained. go buy the game.
i'm very excited to blog this. i have played a new game. and it is excellent. you should get it. it is, almost inevitably, a rio grande game. a quick google reveals them to be an american company. and they specialise in importing german games. NB, the germans are far, far better at making board games than us. this, though is designed by the wonderfully monikered donald x. vaccarino, who is american. imagine! it won the big prize at the german game awards (that is a big thing) like the excellent carcassone before it.
the name of the game is dominion and it is a deck-building game. i've never seen this sort of game engine before, and it reminded me in a way of my all-time favourite game - magic: the gathering (previous blog here). yes, i am aware of how massive a dweeb i am. now, what this actually means is that you have a deck of cards each and there are all the rest of the cards in organised piles on the table. the card types are: money, victory and kingdom cards. you buy new victory and kingdom cards with the money cards (once a turn). you use kingdom cards to do stuff (once a turn). and you use victory cards to win (count up at the end). what is fun is that you keep adding to your deck and when it is done you shuffle and deal a new hand from the deck; it is recycled again and again as you add to it and you've got to keep the balance right between the types of cards in your deck.
why is this good, then? well... the key lies in a concept called card advantage, which is a concept in magic: the gathering theory. (seriously, you have no idea how massive a loser i am). basically, the idea is that if you get to use more cards than the opposition then you will win (ceteris parabus). how does this work in dominion? good question, team. what i've neglected to say so far is what "stuff" the kingdom cards let you do. with them you can throw a card out of your deck in exchange for a different one, or force an opponent to throw a card away, or steal one from them or (and here's the good bit) draw more cards. there is nothing as powerful as drawing more cards in these kind of games. in addition, some cards let you play an extra kingdom card on your turn. if you get to draw and play another card, you are laughing. if you manage to build up a string of manoeuvres (this program says that's a mis-spelt word; it can go fuck itself) where you draw card after card and do action after action you are giggling uncontrollably while the other players wait for their turn. well, i am.
this is probably really badly explained. go buy the game.
16.2.11
the ACMS (or, the CPRTC)
{plug} warning {/p}
dear interwebs. today is a wednesday. wednesday is about comedy. and i have been spending an inordinate amount of my time doing admin for a new comedy night what i am doing. it is going to be bonkers. the show itself has a long and off-putting name:
and this is deliberate. it's not going to be a straightforward evening's entertainment. we have gone through quite a few possible taglines for the show; we need something that really communicates that this isn't your usual comedy night. we did (well, i did) consider "fresh sisyphean comedy". but noone apart from me thinks that that is funny.
when (john-) luke roberts and i first decided to amalgamate the comedy nights we were both thinking of starting in order to halve the workload, it was way back in august. we had ideas a-plenty to shove into a night, comedian friends a-plenty to do the gig but, crucially, no venue. it has taken us over six months to find a venue that is interesting and, more importantly, interested in the gig. (when i was running tom:foolery in escape bar in soho, they couldn't give a fuck with wings). so, i'm delighted to announce our partnership with the new red lion theatre in angel. it's a delightful space, well kitted out and pretty easy to get to.
we've now started booked (read "herding") comedians for the shows up until may. we've got some exciting people lined up. and everyone who is coming is going to try out something risky or mental or noble or all three. we've also got some regular sections:
dear interwebs. today is a wednesday. wednesday is about comedy. and i have been spending an inordinate amount of my time doing admin for a new comedy night what i am doing. it is going to be bonkers. the show itself has a long and off-putting name:
The Alternative Comedy Memorial Society
(or, The Captain Planet Repertory Theatre Company)
when (john-) luke roberts and i first decided to amalgamate the comedy nights we were both thinking of starting in order to halve the workload, it was way back in august. we had ideas a-plenty to shove into a night, comedian friends a-plenty to do the gig but, crucially, no venue. it has taken us over six months to find a venue that is interesting and, more importantly, interested in the gig. (when i was running tom:foolery in escape bar in soho, they couldn't give a fuck with wings). so, i'm delighted to announce our partnership with the new red lion theatre in angel. it's a delightful space, well kitted out and pretty easy to get to.
the venue, at least, will be accessible!
- will andrews has a thing on his head
- please welcome jesus christ
- old joke new joke
- captain planet interactive repertory theatre
- the musical
- the most hilarious taste in the world
A failure! A noble failure!
15.2.11
a music thing.
this is a thing i meant to do years ago. i think it's amusing. i may be wrong.
basically, it's meant to create a soundtrack to that biopic movie about your
life in which you're always supposed to know who to cast.
basically, it's meant to create a soundtrack to that biopic movie about your
life in which you're always supposed to know who to cast.
- open your music library
- put it on shuffle
- press play
- for every question, type the song that's playing
- when you go to a new question, press the next button
- don't lie and try to pretend you are cool...
opening credits: oh, well by professor longhair
one could do much worse. i can imagine an
eighties montage style start to a movie with
this tune. incidentally, professor longhair's
band is called the shuffling hungarians.
waking up: what good am i? by tom jones
amazing! a dylan cover from the welshman's
latest album that is all about self-loathing. this
is not going to be a happy movie. sample lyric:
"what good am i? / if i say foolish things / and
i laugh in the face / of what sorrow brings". i
think, perhaps, i'm waking up on a park bench.
that has actually happened.
first day at school: hot thing by prince
erm. a little bit filthy for my schooldays. perhaps
it is a flashback dream bit where i am cooler.
falling in love: yer so bad by tom petty
"oh, yer so bad / best i've ever had". a brilliant song.
i'll leave you to make your own conclusions. suffice it
to say that my show is sort of about heartbreak.
fight song: just the way you are by billy joel
beautiful song. is it really a fight song? i'm gonna have
to question the director's decision here. unless they've
done it all slo-mo and arty. ok. i take it back. that could
be very eloquent. i hope it's a good fight.
breaking up: let's pretend we're bunny rabbits by the magnetic fields
brilliant. ill-advised break up sex. lots of it. sample lyric:
"i can keep it up all night / i can keep it up all day / let's
pretend we're bunny rabbits / until we pass away".
school ball: guess the time by king creosote
this song's only 1:08! i guess i'm not there for long. too busy being
protagonistic, i guess. [NB song not on spotify].
life's ok: asmarina (my asmara) by mulatu astatke
of course everything's ok! there's ethiopian jazz playing! although, if
old mulatu is talking about asmara, he is presumably eritrean. either
way, it's a corking tune. and you should well listen to the rest of the
ethiopiques series of records. [NB this song isn't on spotify, so the play-
list i'm assembling will include an alternate mulatu astatke song].
mental breakdown: my wandering days are over by belle & sebastian
that makes sense. i didn't live anywhere for longer than 18 months
until i was eleven. and then i lived in bangladesh for six years. i imagine
that if i do suffer a catastrophic mental collapse it will have something
to do with a sense of dislocation. but... *sniff*... don't worry about men.
driving: perhaps vampires is a bit strong but... by arctic monkeys
this works. not much to say about that fact. it's an alright song.
flashback: she's the one by the beta band
only one of the best songs ever to soundtrack MY nostalgic flashback.
it already sounds like a hallucinogenic dream sequence. soft focus please,
mr director. let child actor me pout!
getting back together: dave the butcher by tom waits
i can't help thinking that this doesn't augur well for the reconvened
relationship. it's a strange organ instrumental with banging of pots.
wedding: i feel like the mother of world by smog
"god is a word / and the argument ends there". i expect it shan't be a
church service, then. it's a lovely, lilting song that isn't on spotify... so
you should buy it. the album is called 'a river ain't too much to love'.
birth of a child: buenos aires by andrew lloyd webber (from evita)
no.
final battle: bitch by the rolling stones
amazzles. great stuff.
death scene: buddy bradley by adam green
some mid-tempo madness from ex-moldy peach. it's alright. but i'll
be dead so don't mind.
funeral song: if i am a stranger by ryan adams
"if i am a stranger now to you / i will always be". that works doesn't
it? i am a huge adams fan, but it seems to me that his best work is
behind him. at least while he stays happy. BORING.
end credits: cousins by vampire weekend
i think this is the opening credits for 'the kids are alright'. worst bit
of the movie. but not cos of this song. this song is swell.
while making the spotify playlist, i stumbled across this. i think i might
listen to this a lot. peru? really? brilliant.
10.2.11
abort and adopt (a card game)
a card game what i invented. with some help from my friend lewis and some refining from my friend evil. i invented it (with the above caveats) last summer when i was living in a warehouse (read "converted office") with eight or so people. so there was always someone with whom one could have a glass of wine with at night - and play cards.
the game itself is a sort of poker variant (i've invented one in the past - the inimitable (and very stupid) "sloppy seconds": five card draw, two swaps (one with the pack, one to the left), you must swap two cards both times, twos are wild). if the previous parenthetical text is confusing, i'm sorry. you might not get the rest of this. i'm not going to explain poker here. just this version.
the game can be played by two or three players - either has its merits - but no more as there are not enough cards in the deck. (i believe that lewis has played with two decks and five players). each player has a five column layout as above... so that's one card in the first column, two in the second etc. KEY POINT: everyone forgets this, even when i tell them that everyone forgets it. you must make a poker hand (five cards) from all five columns. that's one from EACH column.
play is as follows:
if you do try it, let me know.
the game itself is a sort of poker variant (i've invented one in the past - the inimitable (and very stupid) "sloppy seconds": five card draw, two swaps (one with the pack, one to the left), you must swap two cards both times, twos are wild). if the previous parenthetical text is confusing, i'm sorry. you might not get the rest of this. i'm not going to explain poker here. just this version.
the game can be played by two or three players - either has its merits - but no more as there are not enough cards in the deck. (i believe that lewis has played with two decks and five players). each player has a five column layout as above... so that's one card in the first column, two in the second etc. KEY POINT: everyone forgets this, even when i tell them that everyone forgets it. you must make a poker hand (five cards) from all five columns. that's one from EACH column.
play is as follows:
- turn over the first card (column one). examine the state of play. if betting, round one of betting is now. betting is strictly unnecessary.
- pick up the next two cards (column two). place them back down, one face up.
- examine the second column of the player to your left (the only other player if playing heads-up). choose one of them to be discarded, i.e. aborted. next round of betting.
- third column. two face up. abortion. betting.
- fourth column. two face up. (this round is called the "victorian terrace" because it is two up, two down). abortion. betting.
- fifth column. three face up. abortion... and then... adoption. examine the third, fourth and fifth columns of the player to your right (also the only other player if heads up). take one of these cards and add it to one of your columns.
- final round of betting. see who is the winner.
if you do try it, let me know.
11.1.11
lungwidge.
{apol reason="not posting"} deeply sorry {/apol}
tuesdays are, i rediscover, to be concerned with language. i cannot think of much pertinent to write. i have resolved, therefore, in the interests of actually writing this damoclean thing before i go out to my meeting (which should result in news) to crowbar a plug for my preview shows via some tenuous discussion of language.
to this end, i am including, in the definition of language, punctuation. i am deeply interested in punctuation. i'm not sure why. i'm sure also that you will have noticed my dogged insistence on a lack of capitalisation. there is no clear reason for it in most cases, imho. punctuation, on the other hand, is indispensible if one wants to be clearly understood. it follows that i love e. e. cummings.
the actual corollary is in performance: the pauses and beats of delivering speech on stage (or camera) are as punctuation. that is, essential to the meaning and intention of the piece.
i invite you to come and judge the meaning and intention of my performance on the 18th of february if you are in london (facebook event, theatre website), or the 27th if you are in bristol (no link yet). other dates will happen, but that's all i know for sure.
it's a show where i discuss straight-to-dvd disney movies and heartbreak.
tuesdays are, i rediscover, to be concerned with language. i cannot think of much pertinent to write. i have resolved, therefore, in the interests of actually writing this damoclean thing before i go out to my meeting (which should result in news) to crowbar a plug for my preview shows via some tenuous discussion of language.
to this end, i am including, in the definition of language, punctuation. i am deeply interested in punctuation. i'm not sure why. i'm sure also that you will have noticed my dogged insistence on a lack of capitalisation. there is no clear reason for it in most cases, imho. punctuation, on the other hand, is indispensible if one wants to be clearly understood. it follows that i love e. e. cummings.
the actual corollary is in performance: the pauses and beats of delivering speech on stage (or camera) are as punctuation. that is, essential to the meaning and intention of the piece.
i invite you to come and judge the meaning and intention of my performance on the 18th of february if you are in london (facebook event, theatre website), or the 27th if you are in bristol (no link yet). other dates will happen, but that's all i know for sure.
it's a show where i discuss straight-to-dvd disney movies and heartbreak.
27.12.10
five months and a bit.
that's how long it has been since i posted on this. that is, frankly, a bit of a disgrace. it is reconstructive surgery day (the day after boxing day... what? it'll catch on. you'll see) and i am seated on a seat in the family seat in t'yorkshire, groggy from the joy of cricket and its entailed late night drinking gin lime sodas.
it's a monday. and my previous stricture has lain down music as the topic du jour. and so, i share with you a playlist (spotify link). it's called ODDER/WETTER and hopefully has a couple ting that you don't yet know. i made it while pootling about on spotify on the related artists bit. the starting point was the tallest man on earth (youtube link), a swedish singer-songwriter with an early-dylan-shaped indentation in the part of the cerebral cortex responsible for english pronunciation. he is also an impressive enough folk guitar basher and in possession of the honour of being one of only two artists to which my wee brother has ever introduced me (the other is cold war kids). but the main thing about him is his wonderfully bonkers turns of phrase:
also, there's some first aid kit (swedish teenage sisters), slow club (sheffield folk) and scout niblett (nottingham miserabilist and bonnie prince billy acolyte). on which note, i got a phone call from my friend andy on a friday morning a couple of weeks ago. our mutual friend could not take up his ticket to all tomorrow's parties at butlins minehead and did i want a spot in the chalet at a knockdown price. yes. yes, i did.
now. a festival at butlins that i didn't expect? pretty cool, yes? but wait a second. that's not all. all tomorrow's parties (for the uninitiated) is a festival curated by a single band. one band get to choose all the other artists on the bill and usually play a couple times themselves. this one was put together by godspeed you! black emperor. lots of people don't know who they are and subsequently don't find that exciting. but i do and did. they are easily my favourite miserable canadian post-rock band and they should be yours.
much fun was had by all and i made some lovely new friends but the highlight was the fact that they'd picked weird al to close the main stage. ludicrous and beautiful. see you tomorrow.
it's a monday. and my previous stricture has lain down music as the topic du jour. and so, i share with you a playlist (spotify link). it's called ODDER/WETTER and hopefully has a couple ting that you don't yet know. i made it while pootling about on spotify on the related artists bit. the starting point was the tallest man on earth (youtube link), a swedish singer-songwriter with an early-dylan-shaped indentation in the part of the cerebral cortex responsible for english pronunciation. he is also an impressive enough folk guitar basher and in possession of the honour of being one of only two artists to which my wee brother has ever introduced me (the other is cold war kids). but the main thing about him is his wonderfully bonkers turns of phrase:
i know the leak is going to tell youlovely.
there ain't now puppy in your leash
so now he'll fertilize the roses
so I could stay the king you see
also, there's some first aid kit (swedish teenage sisters), slow club (sheffield folk) and scout niblett (nottingham miserabilist and bonnie prince billy acolyte). on which note, i got a phone call from my friend andy on a friday morning a couple of weeks ago. our mutual friend could not take up his ticket to all tomorrow's parties at butlins minehead and did i want a spot in the chalet at a knockdown price. yes. yes, i did.
now. a festival at butlins that i didn't expect? pretty cool, yes? but wait a second. that's not all. all tomorrow's parties (for the uninitiated) is a festival curated by a single band. one band get to choose all the other artists on the bill and usually play a couple times themselves. this one was put together by godspeed you! black emperor. lots of people don't know who they are and subsequently don't find that exciting. but i do and did. they are easily my favourite miserable canadian post-rock band and they should be yours.
much fun was had by all and i made some lovely new friends but the highlight was the fact that they'd picked weird al to close the main stage. ludicrous and beautiful. see you tomorrow.
2.8.10
back in the caledonian hinterland
good morning. i am very excited to be back in edinburgh, prepping for shows. however, as it is a monday, i cannot talk too much about them. i have to focus on music, as per my previous category rule. briefly then, the shows i am, or might be, doing are as follows:
i hope you enjoy it.
- the penny dreadfuls, 18:00, pleasance one
- gutted: a revenger's musical, 23:15, assembly ballroom
- i am directing six and a half loves by the redoubtable terry saunders, 15:15, pleasance beneath
- i will be hosting tom:foolery, the comedy night when only toms perform
- i may do a solo show... thom tuck goes straight to dvd - more info laters
i hope you enjoy it.
31.3.10
if you'd have known i were coming, you'd have baked a cake
wednesday. and my pre-assigned topic is comedy. useful, as i have a gig to plug. not that anybody reads this. but when this night goes down in legend, there will be record of its happening that can be regarded as basically factual.
the night in question will be in london (more's the pity) and, specifically, soho and, even more specifically, in the escape bar on brewer street. it has to start on time (seven of the pm), cos the venue are being weird and have started advertising their (actually wildly enjoyable) trannyoke night as starting before we usually end. oh well. we're moving after this one.
the night is called tom:foolery, and is an evening of entertainment where all said entertainment is provided by people called thomas. to date we have had the likes of tom stade, tom parry off of pappy's fun club (he is julius in this clip) and devastatingly attractive best newcomer 2007 tom basden. i am the resident tom:pere...
the next one, though, is massive. we will have tom craine, tom deacon, tom price and the majestic tom wrigglesworth. and more toms than that. i shan't mention them all, as you'll get tom blindness. but on the seventh o' this month at seven pm, do make your way down to soho.
PS, if you're called tom, you get in for a quid.
the night in question will be in london (more's the pity) and, specifically, soho and, even more specifically, in the escape bar on brewer street. it has to start on time (seven of the pm), cos the venue are being weird and have started advertising their (actually wildly enjoyable) trannyoke night as starting before we usually end. oh well. we're moving after this one.
the night is called tom:foolery, and is an evening of entertainment where all said entertainment is provided by people called thomas. to date we have had the likes of tom stade, tom parry off of pappy's fun club (he is julius in this clip) and devastatingly attractive best newcomer 2007 tom basden. i am the resident tom:pere...
the next one, though, is massive. we will have tom craine, tom deacon, tom price and the majestic tom wrigglesworth. and more toms than that. i shan't mention them all, as you'll get tom blindness. but on the seventh o' this month at seven pm, do make your way down to soho.
PS, if you're called tom, you get in for a quid.
30.3.10
tuesday... what are they again?
i have, along with the coterie (d, h, i & n) just got back from the caledonian hinterland. it was a reminder of many things about scotland. firstly, it's titting cold. secondly, i love it. thirdly, glasgow is the best gig you can ever do. seriously, well done glasgow. it's our fifth year at your lovely comedy festival and we'll be back.
the title of this post refers to the fact i have failed to update this blog six times a week (!) as i thought i would do. and consequently, i have forgotten what tuesdays are supposed to be.
*quickly checks
ah, yes. language. further to the last post, i thought i'd share a love of mine. many of the people who know me will have been subjected, at some point or another, to some caterwauling in spanish. i have, for some time, been mildly obsessed with ricky martin. now, i've only got three ricky albums (that's a small number isn't it? a small number). my favourite things on these miesterworks are the spanish language versions of songs that were hits in english.
i have sung these songs in spanish at karaoke, at karaoke circus and on my own while walking down hackney streets at night. they're proper good. but at least half of their appeal for me is the spanish language. they remind me that i have the ability to understand what someone speaking FOREIGN is saying. nuts. plus, the lyrics are often beyond stupid.
a case in point is the spanish version of livin' la vida loca (on other counts an exceptionally good song) where credulity stretches to breaking point.
it starts soberly enough with reference to the "queen of the night" (prescient, much?) and a "goddess of voodoo". so far, so silly. "i can't save myself" opines our ricky but wonders whether you could save yourself. then it really gets going... "the web of the spider, the nail of the dragon". we presume this is some sort of voodoo recipe, but it's never really explained. skip a bit about hell and we get to "te besa y te desnudo"... she kisses you and strips you. does she? ok. i don't remember that in the english. and then you're doing a "baile demencial" (an insane dance). just brilliant.
in all seriousness, though, good on him for coming out. it's been an open secret for years. i know a fella who overhead ricky martin bitching that george michael had stolen his boyfriend (this was back in 2001) so i've known since then. but i think we all knew.
but now you know that i love ricky martin.
the title of this post refers to the fact i have failed to update this blog six times a week (!) as i thought i would do. and consequently, i have forgotten what tuesdays are supposed to be.
*quickly checks
ah, yes. language. further to the last post, i thought i'd share a love of mine. many of the people who know me will have been subjected, at some point or another, to some caterwauling in spanish. i have, for some time, been mildly obsessed with ricky martin. now, i've only got three ricky albums (that's a small number isn't it? a small number). my favourite things on these miesterworks are the spanish language versions of songs that were hits in english.
y en un rincón, caímos juntosshe does, it would appear, bang. there's no real accounting for the fact i like this. the rest of my record collection is primarily white guys with white guitars. not that i'm proud of that, but it's true. if they've never done a dylan cover, then they probably don't figure highly in my most played artists...
en un rito de pasión
y al tocar su pielsenti el calor
yo puse el deseo, ella puso el control,
she bangs, she bangs
i have sung these songs in spanish at karaoke, at karaoke circus and on my own while walking down hackney streets at night. they're proper good. but at least half of their appeal for me is the spanish language. they remind me that i have the ability to understand what someone speaking FOREIGN is saying. nuts. plus, the lyrics are often beyond stupid.
a case in point is the spanish version of livin' la vida loca (on other counts an exceptionally good song) where credulity stretches to breaking point.
la reina de la noche
la diosa del vudú
yo no podré salvarme
¿podrás salvarte tú?
la tela de la araña,
la uña del dragón
te lleva a los infiernos
ella es tu adicción...
te besa y te desnudo
con tu baile demencial...
it starts soberly enough with reference to the "queen of the night" (prescient, much?) and a "goddess of voodoo". so far, so silly. "i can't save myself" opines our ricky but wonders whether you could save yourself. then it really gets going... "the web of the spider, the nail of the dragon". we presume this is some sort of voodoo recipe, but it's never really explained. skip a bit about hell and we get to "te besa y te desnudo"... she kisses you and strips you. does she? ok. i don't remember that in the english. and then you're doing a "baile demencial" (an insane dance). just brilliant.
in all seriousness, though, good on him for coming out. it's been an open secret for years. i know a fella who overhead ricky martin bitching that george michael had stolen his boyfriend (this was back in 2001) so i've known since then. but i think we all knew.
but now you know that i love ricky martin.
9.2.10
language ii (and apology)
sorry. that's the apology bit done.
i speak, as the more e-agle eyed amongst you will have noticed, basic english. it is not even that much of an effort for me. it just sort of slips out. i have a thought and in no time at all it is sliding through my brain flume into the world on an english language lilo.
sorry. that's a new apology for the dreadful extended metaphor above.
in addition to this i can speak spanish. i learnt it, as one does, at an american school in bangladesh. my teachers were all native speakers: colombian, peruvian, mexican. and i got quite good - i was technically two years ahead of syllabus. but i was nowhere near being the best in the class. that particular honour went to the spectacularly bemonikered maurice ogaick, canadian, best swimmer in the team and all round good egg. he had initially learnt his español in argentina and we all sought to copy him as much as possible. well. i did.
so much so that when i returned to yorkshire for year eleven (tenth grade US readers (upper fifth posh readers (fourth year scottish readers))) and GCSE spanish, i was told that i had a distinct argentinian accent by the teaching assistant from sevilla. thanks, mo. as a sort of side note, i've always been pretty good at accents, both in a comedic sense and otherwise. to be taken seriously with a silly accent, here's a tip: rip the piss with a serious face. it worked when i was learning japanese.
my point is, i think, that the level of language teaching in this country is devastatingly poor. when i arrived back from teh abroadz, i sat at the back of top set spanish. when i was asked a question in spanish, i replied... in spanish. the entire class turned around to look at me with a mixture of amazement and disgust. i shut up pretty quick, sat at the back for a year getting worse at spanish and ended up with an A*. tut.
when i did a-level, i was so out of practice and my teacher so spectacularly rubbish i sort of lost interest until i got a job on the basis that i could speak spanish. it turned out i still could. no thanks to anyone in this country.
last thing... i've always thought that i'd love to have bilingual kids. but, chuck doesn't speak another language so it'd have to be me barking at the little one in pidgin spanish. not an edifying thought. hey, at least he'd have an argentinian accent.
i speak, as the more e-agle eyed amongst you will have noticed, basic english. it is not even that much of an effort for me. it just sort of slips out. i have a thought and in no time at all it is sliding through my brain flume into the world on an english language lilo.
sorry. that's a new apology for the dreadful extended metaphor above.
in addition to this i can speak spanish. i learnt it, as one does, at an american school in bangladesh. my teachers were all native speakers: colombian, peruvian, mexican. and i got quite good - i was technically two years ahead of syllabus. but i was nowhere near being the best in the class. that particular honour went to the spectacularly bemonikered maurice ogaick, canadian, best swimmer in the team and all round good egg. he had initially learnt his español in argentina and we all sought to copy him as much as possible. well. i did.
so much so that when i returned to yorkshire for year eleven (tenth grade US readers (upper fifth posh readers (fourth year scottish readers))) and GCSE spanish, i was told that i had a distinct argentinian accent by the teaching assistant from sevilla. thanks, mo. as a sort of side note, i've always been pretty good at accents, both in a comedic sense and otherwise. to be taken seriously with a silly accent, here's a tip: rip the piss with a serious face. it worked when i was learning japanese.
my point is, i think, that the level of language teaching in this country is devastatingly poor. when i arrived back from teh abroadz, i sat at the back of top set spanish. when i was asked a question in spanish, i replied... in spanish. the entire class turned around to look at me with a mixture of amazement and disgust. i shut up pretty quick, sat at the back for a year getting worse at spanish and ended up with an A*. tut.
when i did a-level, i was so out of practice and my teacher so spectacularly rubbish i sort of lost interest until i got a job on the basis that i could speak spanish. it turned out i still could. no thanks to anyone in this country.
last thing... i've always thought that i'd love to have bilingual kids. but, chuck doesn't speak another language so it'd have to be me barking at the little one in pidgin spanish. not an edifying thought. hey, at least he'd have an argentinian accent.
8.1.10
musics
after the lovely wateracre (of whom more when the next tom:foolery gigs start!) and further to my last music post, i don't really have an album of the year for oh nine. so i've decided, like him, to look at the stats. not as simple as it appears, really, as there is not really a huge amount of data. but, according to my iTunes most played AND released in oh nine, here is a list:
but. i didn't listen to it that much. if we have a look at my stats for top five listened to tracks since we got this computer (in oh nine), none of them were released last year...
- bruises - chairlift
- one night in october - little comets
- always like this - bombay bicycle club
- jiggery pokery - the duckworth lewis method
- you're not coming home tonight - first aid kit
but. i didn't listen to it that much. if we have a look at my stats for top five listened to tracks since we got this computer (in oh nine), none of them were released last year...
- the world's greatest - an incredible cover of an r kelly song (who incidentally has just come on my spotify... eerie) by the god that is bonnie 'prince' billy.
- hook - blues traveler
- let's dance - david bowie
- only wanna be with you - hootie and the blowfish (shut up!)
- alone again or - love
- dancing in the dark - bruce springsteen
- standing in the way of control - the gossip
- hook - blues traveler
- does this ean you're moving on? - the airborne toxic event
- frankie and albert - taj mahal
3.1.10
대역폭
so. this is the second part of my essay. part one is here. i have no doubt that this is confusing and probably unsound thinking, but i want to write a book in the end. so i best get some sentences down.
i'd like to have a crack at the concept of bandwidth: not as in computers and the internet specifically, although that is a useful example. what i mean when i say bandwidth (and it's not my terminology, but i can't remember whose it is - which is ironic if you know the direction this essay eventually goes in) is the quality of information transfer...
it is about systems. and transfer of information in between. if you think of morse code it's likely to be among the simpler forms of communication we've got: a set of beeps stands for a word. on either end of the wire there is, hopefully, a person. inside this person is a veritable swirl of information: thoughts, memories and hopes. so... we have two systems connected via a very simple connection. this is two high bandwidth systems with a low bandwidth connection. it is my contention that interesting things occur, that is, we can learn most about systems, where the bandwidth is restricted.
i'd like to have a crack at the concept of bandwidth: not as in computers and the internet specifically, although that is a useful example. what i mean when i say bandwidth (and it's not my terminology, but i can't remember whose it is - which is ironic if you know the direction this essay eventually goes in) is the quality of information transfer...
it is about systems. and transfer of information in between. if you think of morse code it's likely to be among the simpler forms of communication we've got: a set of beeps stands for a word. on either end of the wire there is, hopefully, a person. inside this person is a veritable swirl of information: thoughts, memories and hopes. so... we have two systems connected via a very simple connection. this is two high bandwidth systems with a low bandwidth connection. it is my contention that interesting things occur, that is, we can learn most about systems, where the bandwidth is restricted.
2.1.10
blood
certain photographs of yourself can set up camp in your brain. they stand for moments, thoughts and images.
while at university, i was heavily involved in the bedlam theatre. it's a fantastic place. due to a series of coincidences and contingencies, i was only really cast in comic roles. i wasn't unduly stressed by this, as i enjoy being funny. but, i did (and do) harbour ambitions as a real actor. my opportunity came about when an ex-girlfriend cast me as jesus. which isn't as twisted as it sounds. cj is (and always was) an artist and the show was an (overlong in retrospect) version of the york cycle of the mystery plays.
when i look back at the photo, i smile. it stands for the moment i was allowed to do a bit of acting at last, and for the six years i spent in edinburgh in general. but most of all, i think i look cool.
while at university, i was heavily involved in the bedlam theatre. it's a fantastic place. due to a series of coincidences and contingencies, i was only really cast in comic roles. i wasn't unduly stressed by this, as i enjoy being funny. but, i did (and do) harbour ambitions as a real actor. my opportunity came about when an ex-girlfriend cast me as jesus. which isn't as twisted as it sounds. cj is (and always was) an artist and the show was an (overlong in retrospect) version of the york cycle of the mystery plays.
eli, eli lema sabacthanithe show was good, and the crucifixion exceptionally bloody. i released four different bodily fluids onto the stage every performance (sweat, spit, tears and vomit). one day, i came offstage after being up on the cross and was snapped by david. i think it was the last night of the show and we had used all the blood we had left.
when i look back at the photo, i smile. it stands for the moment i was allowed to do a bit of acting at last, and for the six years i spent in edinburgh in general. but most of all, i think i look cool.
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